October 22, 2007

Go To Your Happy Place, Mommy.

My happy place, at least the one I keep in my head, is a lovely little cottage in a tropical paradise. And lots of lovely drinks served in pineapples! Let's just say that I need a looooooong vacation in my Happy Place. Sorry I've been incommunicado lately, but we've been dealing with teen issues. Teen issues, you say? Yes, our 5 yr. old has progressed to 16 yrs. old in just a few short months. We have a really devine combination of wild behaviour, testing testing testing, disrespecting mommy, lying, taking sister's clothes & hiding them... And all of this is iced with the usual Terrible Two's. Need I say more?Any ideas on consequences and raising your child to be a compassionate respectful one? We are not in the corporal punishment camp and far from the new agey habit of long explanations for misbehaviour, but need consequences that will mean something to them.

The hardest part of all of this is that Honeybun was such a loving, affectionate, sweet, respectful child before the arrival of SweetPea. They adore each other (most of the time) and play together nicely (again, most of the time), but now Honeybun treats her formerly beloved Mommy like dirt. I must admit, while it P.O.'s me it also hurts me deeply that our relationship has changed so drastically since last December. So, you moms of older children - is this normal behaviour? Or is it a hint of deeper issues that go unresolved. Please, I need advice.

Well, must go off with SweetPea to make buckets of crabapple butter. Will post more later this evening. Afterall, life isn't all dark clouds and rainstorms and I must fill you in on the good parts too!:)


Ohio said...

Just letting you know that I love reading the updates, keep them coming. Unfortunately I have no advice to give, but I am sure you will figure it out.

A Special Family said...

I love your site and all your updates. Personally, I would try to speak to an expert, not because you are doing anything wrong, but because maybe the adoption of sister has created some uncertainties or reduced trust, effected attachment etc. I would try and find someone who has a speciality with international adoption. Another REALLY good book: Beyond Logic, Consequences and Control: Every single adoptive family I know who has read it, has said it made such a difference.
Best wishes!